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I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!”4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - “Ah, isn’t that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.”5. US PGA Commentator - “One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. Oh my god!! What have I just said?”6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on ‘Time Team Live’ said: “You’d eat beaver if you could get it.”7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn’t, turned to the weatherman and asked, “So Bob, where’s that eight inches you promised me last night?” Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: “Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.”9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on ‘Look North’ said: “There’s nothing like. I'm going to change. If you want to fix us a drink, the booze's in the cupboard."I looked at the phone, stared long and hard. And decided on booze first. After I poured our whiskey's, Kelly rejoined me in the livingroom wearing a red kimono."Real nice, Kelly," I said again.She walked towards me and took her drink. She stayed close, sipping her glass, and staring into my eyes. Maybe it was the liquor, maybe it was the better lighting, but I swore she bore a striking resemblance to my wife. A younger Mary...maybe."No phone call yet?" She said. I shook my head slowly. "Want to get comfortable first?" I said nothing as she led me upstairs to her loft bedroom. "There's another line up here."My heart was throbbing as she took the glass from me and set it on her nighttable. Then she turned back to me and began to unbutton my shirt. She pushed my shirt off and started on my belt."I don't have a lot of money," I said.She seemed amused. "That's okay. Every now and then I like to give to.
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